Even people who are Life Coaches have their own issues. I find it very funny when I’m having trouble in my relationship that people think I should have all my own answers. I’m the first one to say tell me your problem and I’m help you work it out.

I deal with all the same issues as everyone else. That is why I understand the struggles you go through with your partner. Every relationship has its ups and downs. Have you ever thought one of your friends has the best relationship ever because they get along so well and don’t fight? Think again, any couple that never disagrees has some real issues that are just not being dealt with. For instance, when I was a teenager and my friends met my parents they would say “Your parents are so awesome”. I thought this was so funny because they had no idea what it was like when it was just my family. Sure, on the outside everything looked great but trusts me my family was as dysfunctional as the next.

I am very intuitive even in my own relationships. I deal head on with any problems that may arise whether it is with my partner, parent, siblings and friends. That is what attracts people to me for advice. They see me dealing in reality and not fantasy. With me you will always get feedback which is honest.

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When your emotions are all over the place in your relationship you MUST pay attention. Should I stay or should I go is a question that does need an answer. Take some time alone to listen to your inner chatter and you will find the answers. Journal if it helps! Need to talk?

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This is a common theme for most people. Does your past relationships affect your current?

You can leave your past relationships behind but they teach you so many lessons that you shouldn’t forget. When you first meet someone new we tend to discuss our past relationships. Sometimes there is common ground and experiences but sometimes we share a little too much and it can come back to bit you. Think before you reveal something that can and sometimes will be used against you in a future argument.

Sharing is important but sometimes too much information is too much.

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I have to say that I am a hopeless romantic and every once in a while something leads me to fantasize about the endless opportunities for romance. How amazing would it be to have your boyfriend, girlfriend, or significant other invite you on a luxurious private jet and has you fly around the world and tour exotic places?

If you dream big and have the financial resources, consider flying in a private jet and being treated like a king or queen. With today’s high-end jet charter companies this is possible. If you want something truly unique, treating the person your in love with to something special is priceless. Giving them a surprise like this is so worth the value.

Romance aside; think about all the different occasions that a private jet can be used for whether it is business, family or just plain fun. A girl can dream but why not turn the dream into reality?

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Below is written from the folks I received my Empowment Life Coaching training. Enjoy

Empowerment Concepts
Taken from the book Empowerment—The Art of Creating Your Life as You Want It
By David Gershon & Gail Straub

Empowerment – to harness the passion of your heart and the power of your mind and create your fullest expression of being human.

Creating vision for your life – It is vital to direct our gaze away from our problems and inabilities. To create an inspired life vision we must develop an acute awareness of the possibilities that lie within us. Until we do this, our potential remains dormant. It is necessary to learn to transform limiting beliefs and behavior patterns, as well as how to overcome difficult life situations and problems, not as ends in themselves but as a part of the process of self-creation. It is shifting our basic attitude toward life from problem-solving to vision-creating. It requires us to let go of the deep problem-oriented programming of our culture and accept the belief that we can and will create the life we want.

Reasons why we don’t have what we want –
• We are not yet clear about what we want, or
• We have not yet learned the proper methods of creating it.

The Growing Edge – the soft new edge of life that is just becoming. Human beings who are vital and alive are full of vitality and always thrusting out in new directions. The part of our being where this new growth is occurring is our growing edge. It’s that place in who we are that is just coming into existence. The growing edge is the point that our ever-evolving self is moving toward next.
As you work on your growing edge, there are a variety of feelings you may experience: fear, a deep sense of well-being, pain, discomfort, exhilaration. This is all part of the process. Understanding that growth is a totally individual process liberates us from that all-too-pervasive human foible of judging ourselves in relation to someone else or some preconceived notion of how we should be. To grow is to be alive, and to be on the growing edge is to experience life in its most dynamic state, that of becoming.

Shaping Your World - Our thoughts and beliefs create everything that happens in our life. What manifests in our life is a direct result of the thoughts that we are affirming. Nothing happens in our life without a preexisting belief that brings that thing to pass. Although this sounds simple, it is a complex process. We are generally not aware of what we believe. The vast majority of the beliefs that we are manifesting are unconscious and unfortunately many of them are self-limiting. Most of our pain, fear, and suffering are caused by these unconscious, unexamined, self-limiting beliefs.

Mental Clearing – The process of examining and transforming these limiting beliefs is what we call mental clearing. To be able to create the new we must first clear out the old. We can’t effectively manifest a new belief if we are simultaneously holding on to an old, entrenched belief that opposed this new idea. One of the mistakes made by people working with the manifestation principles is to think that all that is required of them is to affirm what they want and it will happen. They don’t realize they must first clear from their mind the self-limiting beliefs. What manifests is what we really believe, not what we would like to believe. Until our self-limiting beliefs are made conscious and transformed, they will continue to get in the way and inhibit our ability to create what we want. We must create space in order for the new to come in. Yet is it difficult to let go of the familiar and safe.

The Principle of Vision – We are most willing to release old beliefs, emotional pain, and other baggage when we have a clear vision of what we will replace it with. The clearer the vision, the more we will be attracted to it, and the less we will need to hold on to self-limiting beliefs. In order to create anything you must have a vision of what it is you want to manifest. The more definite and clear the vision, the more definite and clear the manifestation. Creating a vision for your life requires a willingness to explore and discover what’s important to you, not somebody else.

The Three Principles of Manifestation –
• The Principle of Creative Thought: What we believe is what we create.
• The Principle of Mental Clearing: We must clear out self-limiting beliefs before we can manifest new beliefs.
• The Principle of Vision: In order to manifest, we must have a clear vision of what we want to create.

The Technique of Manifestation – You must be aware of where you want to direct your mental attention and learn how to do it with skill. You must become conscious of the manifesting process rather than continuing to unconsciously manifest things you don’t want. Your mind is a piece of fertile land. Whether cultivated or neglected, something will grow. There are two aspects to manifesting. First you must create a potent mental seed, which consists of a directed thought called an affirmation and a specific image called a visualization. Then you need to cultivate and nourish this mental seed so that it grows to fruition—this is called the energizing process.

Affirmation – The Seed Thought – An affirmation is a statement affirming what you want in your life. It is an articulation of the new belief you are creating. To be effective it needs to be:

1. Written down – The act of writing down an affirmation begins the process of making your intangible thought more concrete. You begin to experience the seed idea more sensually as you write it and see it. The process of putting a wish into sentence form demands that you be clear about what you want.

2. Stated in the Positive – Most of us have a tendency to approach growth as a process of overcoming problems as opposed to a process of creating something we want. When we affirm what we don’t want (“I’m no longer going to be afraid of my boss.”) we are actually putting energy into it and nourishing it with our mental attention (the fear is reinforced). When you affirm positive thoughts, you begin the process of manifesting the thing you desire.
3. Succinct - The more to the point and articulate your affirmation, the easier you can focus on it. Avoid making the affirmation wordy. A common mistake is combining several related issues into one statement. This weakens the power of the affirmation for it is much easier to concentrate on one idea at a time than on several. (“I easily express myself with my boss.”) An affirmation should not be an essay. It may start out as one, but is must be whittled down to the essentials.

4. Specific - If the affirmation is specific, you will be able to create clear results in your life. If you do not know what you want, ask, “What is important to me?” and focus on the specifics that you do know. There are no mistakes. What comes back to you is simply feedback that helps you refine your understanding of what you value in life. It is important to remember that you are creating your life every time you think a thought. The only difference is that now you are doing it with awareness.

5. Magnetic – Make your affirmation as attractive as possible. Use adjectives that you find exciting and enlivening. The more the language of the affirmation evokes deep feelings within you, the more you’ll be able to put your full energy behind it. The greater the passion in an affirmation the more it will command your attention and belief. (For someone whose growing edge is improving his/her appearance, “My appearance delights me and makes me proud to be alive.” as opposed to “I am a nice-looking person who is always well dressed and attractive.”)

6. Stated as if it Already Exists - The affirmation will manifest in the time frame that you create in your mind. If you want the seed thought to come o fruition now, you must state it in the present tense. If you state your affirmation as something that will happen in the future, it will always be in the future. (“I am” and “I have” acknowledge that the mental seed is planted and can now grow. On the other hand, “I will” or “I hope” keeps the seed dormant as a future possibility.) We need to see the future in our mind as if it already exists. Don’t worry for the moment about not knowing how you will get from here to there. Remember, what we hold in our thoughts is what we create, whether or not we know the means by which the manifestation will happen.

7. Include You in It – Use “I,” “me,” your name, or any other method of allowing you to personally identify with the affirmation. (“I have an abundant life.” vs. “The universe is abundant.”)

8. About Changes for Yourself, Not Others – Human nature being what it is, we often look at others as the cause of problems we might have with them instead of looking at ourselves. The primary thing we do in fact always have control over is our attitude and behavior. The most effective and enduring way to change a situation is to change yourself.

9. Kept on the Growing Edge to Avoid Sabotage - The affirmation must appear to be within the realm of possibility for you to accept it into your consciousness. If it is an unrealistically large stretch from where you are now, you will subconsciously throw up resistances. The affirmation can’t be such a stretch that you sabotage it with resistance. However, it has to be enough of a stretch to excite you to want to create it.

Visualization – The Seed Image – A visualization is a mental image or picture of what you want to create in your life. Some people find that they are more attracted to images than words because an image is more emotionally appealing. Others feel more comfortable working with the words of an affirmation because words can convey an idea more specifically. Affirmation and Visualization used in tandem create the best results.
Until you can visualize something as being possible, the thing cannot begin to manifest. You must see the possibility clearly in order to move toward it. To have the greatest power to manifest, your visualization should:

1. Evoke Feeling – When you see your mental picture you feel so excited that you want to bring it into your life immediately. The more emotionally appealing the picture, the more enthusiasm you will have to create it.

2. Use a Single Image – Create a simple mental picture which is meaningful to you, something that creates a “moment in time.” Consider what is important to you, abstract the meaning from your thoughts, then find a single image that contains that meaning, a single instant that embodies all the thoughts and feelings. Whatever the image, it should succinctly sum up all the meanings of that desire for you.

3. Include You in the Image – See yourself happily enjoying whatever it is that you have mentally created. Allow yourself to feel the satisfaction and fulfillment of your accomplishment.

4. Be Literal or Metaphoric – Sometimes you will want to create an image that is an exact replication of something you want to bring into your life. At other times, you may be more drawn to using metaphor.

5. Be Physically Depicted – Like the affirmation, the act of expressing your visualization on paper begins to make it come alive physically. This has nothing to do with artistic ability. Stick figures and line drawings are totally satisfactory. Add color to your drawing. If you aren’t inclined to draw, cut pictures from magazines or use photographs. That main thing is to do whatever allows the visualization to come alive for you. Also, you might physically act out the visualization. This brings your affirmation into your body and further enlivens it.

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The summer is now over and so many people who live on the east coast are starting to get depressed. I hear alot of people feel like there is less activties to do and therefore less of a chance to meeting new singles. Plus, I don’t know about you but in New England people seem so much friendly when it’s warm out. I swear it true!

So for all other single folks out now is the time to try Internet Dating if you never had. The dating sites appear to have more activity once the weather changes. Less people travel every weekend and have more free time. I have a hand full of girl friends who have never tried Internet Dating and I’m supporting them in trying something new. Everyone is using the internet to meet people so why shouldn’t you?

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Empowerment Life Coaching is really starting to take center stage. I have been getting a lot of emails asking what Empowerment is all about.

Everyone needs to empower themselves to feel good about their life and the decision one makes. It is a way of working through old tapes in our heads and breaking patterns to move forward. Through my training we really focused on moving from pathology to creating a vision. It can be explain as follows. When we have problems in a relationship for instance sometimes we focus only on the problem. This can be done through self discovery or therapy. It’s great to understand where your issues come from but what do you do next. Empowering one’s self is to move through the problem and change patterns of behavior or those negative thoughts. It is described as weeding ones garden. If you don’t remove the weeds from the garden and tend to the soil your garden will not grow. And you will need to start over.

The same is said for issues or problems that keep coming to the surface. We want to get rid of negative thoughts and create action steps to promote change. This way you break free from negative beliefs and create a new and exciting vision and act plan.

My focus is relationships whether it is with one’s self, partner, family and or friends. I focus on areas such as your Core Beliefs, Personal Power, Emotions, Relationships and Spirituality.

We are the only ones responsible for our lives even in a relationship. All of us have some sort of baggage that we carry around with us and bring into our relationships when relationships don’t work out or are in trouble the best thing to do is to look into what’s your stuff and what’s theirs. You can only work on your own issues and Empowerment Life Coaching maybe for you. Are you ready to weed your garden? If so, contact me and I would be more than happy to talk with you to see if Coaching is right for you.

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When your writing a profile for any internet dating site be honest. Above all, be honest with yourself and take some time to figure out what you want to say. Too many people dance around certain issues. Try not to be too general because you will sound like the next person.

This is the perfect place to say what your looking for in a partner. Don’t be afraid to put it all on the line. When I was on Match.com I was very straight forward about who I am and whom I was looking for. I didn’t care if men were turned off by what I wrote. One thing that used to bug me on Match was men who just winked me and didn’t take the time to send an email. Most of the time these men never even read my profile first and based the wink on my pictures. You can always see who viewed your profile online. If they viewed my profile and winked that was ok but if they didn’t even bother to see what I was all about I would not respond. Even if they seems like a good match. In fact, I even went as far as to say I don’t not respond to anyone who just winks.

I was as honest as possible and had strong core beliefs about who I was looking for in a partner. I showed my serious side and my playful side in my profile. Humor is a must for me so if you got what I said that was great. I was not looking for a “hook up” so I stated that fact but sure enough men who were looking to get lucky and use the internet as a pick up bar would write.

Just beware that manyy people do lie and mislead you but if you use common sense you can weed out the players. Do your research and figure out which site meets your requirements. Also, I have said many times on my blog don’t take rejection to heart. It’s a numbers game…sometimes it takes ten no thank you for one I would like to meet you. Go with you gut when writing your profile or responding to others.

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I know how frustrating it is when people lie online but the truth is “it is what it is”. Why is everyone so surprise by this?

Online dating works in many ways but also is a place for people to lie there pants off. LOL! It’s just so easy to get carried away. Ladies, it’s not just the men that lie. There are simple lies like I’m a non-smoker when in fact you smoke a pack a day. Then we have the big lie of someone being married playing if off as single.

Maybe it’s a fantasy for those who stretch the truth. What I mean is putting up a picture that isn’t yours and thinking its ok. How many times have I seen those pictures of models in picture frames at the store on someone’s profile? Anyone want to guess? 10 times! And lying about your height and weight is so stupid. If you never plan on making a date with the people you communicate with then boy do you waste a lot of time?

But, for all those people trying to find someone special it just makes no sense. I remember I was chatting with a guy online and his photo was very nice. Then he asked me for a second photo of myself and I ask this of him. When I got the photo it wasn’t the same person. And, he had the nerve to call me shallow. He just didn’t get how much that turned me off and that he could lie.

You need to play the internet dating game smart. Use your common sense and go with your gut. If you have a sense that someone is lying to you cut the communication off. When you email or chat with someone over time you will know the real deal. Whatever you do this has nothing to do with you if someone lies. It is not a personal attack but it sure can feel that way.

I promise you there are people out there that are honest and wanting the same things you do. If it sounds too good to be true then I promise you it is. Trust me I have experienced it all on dating sites and I would just move on. In fact I happen to be dating someone I met online and I’m happy. Sure it took awhile to find each other but it will happen. It is just a numbers game.

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Dating someone who travels for work can be a bit stressful. As a teenager my dad traveled for many years during the week. A lot of times he would be so tired and stressed out when he returned home on Friday night. Plus, I could pretty much get away with anything with my mother. I was very responsible as a teenager and did what my folks told me. But, there was a part of me that felt like I didn’t have to listen to my dad since he was never around. There was always so much more tension in the house on the weekends and it felt like you were walking on eggshells because he was so tired and stressed out.

I always said I would never date or marry anyone who traveled for business during the entire work week. For some of the same fears I had surrounding my dad. Their time is so limited on the weekends due to not being around all week. And this is very understandable.

Currently, the man I have been dating has been working out of town during the week. And it actually has not really been a problem plus it is short term. I have learned to deal with him not around during the week and focus on myself. We talk on the phone several times a day and I always look forward to seeing him on Friday night. Plus, we trust each other completely. All I can say is thank god because if I had any doubts it is all I would think about.

Now trust really comes into play in this situation. Anyone who is insecure and has trouble trusting people are the ones who have an issue with this. This can test a relationship on many levels. But, it is a good way to stay focus on your own hobbies and interests. People worry that their partner may cheat on them and you would never know. This is not a great place to be in. You can’t let your imagination run away with you.

My suggestion is that if your dating someone who travels and you just can’t deal with it then your in the wrong relationship. You should examine your choices and do what is in the best interest for your higher self. Who wants to be stressed out or feel like your missing something all week long?

When your looking for a partner it is always a good idea to write down what your ideal relationship would look like. It may surprise you if you are totally honest with yourself.

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