Does your partner push your buttons?

There are times when one is tested within their relationships. It is very hard not to react when your partner’s behavior or words are hurtful. It can really push one’s buttons and your need to sort of what is their stuff and what is yours. I for one have learned not to react right away. I have the ability to look deeper and really see what is going on. We are all tested everyday in one way or another. If you react to everything you could make the situation worse. Step back and above all don’t take on your partners stuff. You partner could be testing you and your relationship which we all do.

Lies and Love

Being dishonest is never good in any relationship. In my opinion lies only come back to bite you in the butt. There are so many people who can’t even keep track of their own lies. If you are one of those people who feel the need to lie I suggest that you take a good long look inside. It is out of insecurities that make people lie because they don’t feel like they will be accepted.

I hear so many stories about deception in relationships that it scary. If you are able to give your heart completely to someone there is always risk involved. We all make mistakes and we are human. No one is perfect so why hide your imperfections?

The truth can only set you free. Be honest with your partner and trust that if they love you they will be supportive. And if not maybe you are with the wrong person. We are not here to judge one another even though we can get caught up in the drama of our lives.

I can tell you long ago I was afraid to tell people how I felt for fear they would leave me. But, once I took the time to work on myself and feel secure the fear just went away. I’m all about risking my heart for the bigger reward that life has to show me. Above all when your honest and speak the truth it’s a win win situation. The most important relationship is with yourself first.

Afraid to talk about the past?

If someone will not discuss their past relationships with you is this a problem? I think it is a huge problem and one that needs to be explored. It just makes me think that they are hiding something or are afraid they will be judged.

When a relationship ends at first you deal with all of your emotions and feelings. But, when some time passes it’s important to look at what lessons were learned. We all need to take responsiblity for our role in any relationship. It is never just one persons fault because a relationship involves two parties.

What may be a good idea to get the discussion started is to ask what the person has learned about themselves in their past relationships. This could lead to your new partner talking about what he or she is afraid to share.

Try it because you have nothing to lose and it is a great way to learn about each other.

Mixed feeling in a relationship

When your emotions are all over the place in your relationship you MUST pay attention. Should I stay or should I go is a question that does need an answer. Take some time alone to listen to your inner chatter and you will find the answers. Journal if it helps! Need to talk?

Conflict in a relationship

Conflict in a relationship can really make you second guess yourself. We must stand behind our belief system but also stay open to others beliefs. Some people can’t deal with conflict well at all. I used to be one of those people. I would get knots in my stomach and get all worked up. I gave in most of the time just to avoid that uncomfortable feeling.

Through finding my our voice and belief in myself I’m now able to manage conflict and stay true to myself. I’m open to others point of views and see both sides of a situation. Sure, my stomach may get in knots still but I’m able to stay calm.

A relationship is a work in progress in my opinion. Only time will tell if you can work through conflict with your partner. Stand your ground when it comes to your beliefs. Both parties need to stay open to each others beliefs. Let the little stuff go but try and work together on the big issues that really matter.

Always listen to your inner voice to guide you and make the best choices for your true self.

Compromising in your relationship

Can two strong personalities keep a relationship going? Compromising in a relationship is not always easy. I have always believed that love is just not enough in a relationship. It takes real work to make a relationship work. When you have two people with strong personalities it can be tough.

The only way it can work is if you both stay open to each others differences and beliefs. I can only speak for myself but I always try and see the other person’s side. You both need to be able to back down and just listen to the other.

I want someone who can accept me for who I am and this includes and the good and bad. I am by no means perfect nor would I expect this from them. Just be honest with yourself and your partner and what is meant to be will be.

When your partner is in a bad mood

There are times when you and the person your dating are not on the same page. We all go through some tough times and this can come out in our behavior towards others. What if one of you has a bad day and comes home in a bad mood?

All you can do is either let your partner vent and talk about what is going on. But, sometimes you may just want to be left alone. What is not fair is to take it out on the ones you love. They are here to support you and may just have your best interest at heart.

I for one always want to help my love ones figure out what is really going on and let them talk about what is on their mind. I find that some people just can’t get out of their own way. Don’t take it personally because it most likely has nothing to do with you. What I suggest is to give the person space if nothing else is working.

Don’t bring your ex’s into your relationships

There has been alot of talk regarding bringing your past relationship into your present ones. If you are the type who talks about past boy or girlfriends I suggest you use good judgement as too how much information is too much.

My bottomline is make peace with your past relationships. Each relationship teaches you lessons so you break free from old patterns or mistakes. No one wants to hear all the details of your past relationships trust me. This may sound tough but just get rid of all the angry and hurt and get over it.

I used to hold onto my past hurts so tight it was killing my chances to move forward and trust someone new. I just knew I was going to get screwed as they say. So what did I do? I just stopped blaming others for my bad relationship choices. I made peace with my past and what do you know I was so much happier. No one is perfect and we all have our issues.

I try and live each day and make the most out of your life.

Holding in your feelings can only do damage to a relationship

Communication is such a huge part of a relationship. If something is bothering you regarding your relationship it is best to let your partner know right away. Holding onto issues will build up until you talk about whatever it is that is bothering you.

What can and will happen is an emotional breakdown that comes out in other ways. Like starting a fight or acting like the other person is a mind reader. It isn’t fair to your partner and they can sense that something is wrong.

As for myself I get very quiet and all in my head. Sometimes my thoughts get out of control and I’m all over the place. My fear is bring up what’s bothering me and my partners reacting. My past experience has taught me that when you fight or disagree the relationship could end. If that were to happen I believe the relationship would end sooner or later.

So what I have learned is to more past my fears and communicate my thoughts and feelings when they start to appear. Otherwise, I will end up acting out and this is not fair to my partner. He isn’t a mind reader and can’t make things all better without having the facts. Most of the time I’m completely in my head and my thoughts are all over the place. So I need to express my feelings right up front once I know what I’m upset about.

Respect in relationships

In order for a relationship to stay strong and grow you must have mutual respect for each other. No two people are alike although you can have much in common. We need to respect the differences. An example is if you and your partner disagree on a specific topic. Just be open to their thoughts and feelings.

You can debate topics or problems but we are each allowed our own opinions. There is no reason to get all stressed out because they don’t see things the way you do. Of course this does not apply on big issues that will affect your relationship. I’m just talking about basic differences.

I personally like having a difference view than my partner’s. We come from two totally different background and have different experiences. We both learn from each other and are open to listening to each other’s opinion. I never wanted to be my male twin because I would be very bored.

So respect each other and stay open!

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