One of the hardest things in a relationship is when one of you are diagnosed with an illness such as cancer. If your just dating do you wonder if your partner will stick around?  It is sad to say that if one of you are looking for an out this is the time when your relationship is tested.  It is also a stressful time for you both due to for different reasons. This can either bring you closer or put a wedge between you.

I know this personally and I can tell you that the relationship is tested.  The stress level is very high.  I’m not sure who has it harder to tell you the truth. One of you is dealing with an illness and the other feels completely helpless because you can’t do a thing to make it better. But, in fact of having someone in your life that loves you completely and stand beside you in your time of need is huge. It’s down right beautiful if you ask me.  The best thing you can do is live your life for this moment and enjoy the time you have together.  In fact I think if you can get through to the otherside you will have a very strong relationship and your love will be even deeper for each other.  In the end talking and being open about how your feeling is the most important thing.  It will keep you grounded.

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If you asked my friends if I live in reality they would say “yes”.  Living  in a fairytale can only harm you and the ones you love. Every couple has their problems but it is up to each person to figure out their own role with the issues. Nothing can last forever and if you think it can you better wake up fast.

I’m not being negative at all but as a women in her mid-forties never married even I know love won’t last forever. I don’t believe we are meant to be with just one person our whole life. And I thank god I never married any of the men I dated years back.  I’m always changing and loving it.  It is only now that I have a clear understanding of what I want out of a relationship.  I’m finally with a great guy who adores me but he can’t be all things to me. I waited a long time to meet a man who loves me for all of me and gets me completely. But, it’s not perfect because nothing is. 

So whether your in a marriage going nowhere or your relationship is not turning out to be what you wanted, then you need to be brave and true to yourself.  All you can do is give it your best but don’t give up without trying to work things out. Fight for what you want and need. Never take the easy way out of life when it comes to anything because there is always great lessons to learn.  Consider a Relationship Coach or Couples Therapy.  As I always say “Honor your inner voice and allow it to guide you”.

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Have you ever talked yourself out of liking someone to avoid your fears or being hurt?  When you have your guard up it is always for a reason.  Most likely it’s there due to past experiences.  There are times when taking a break from dating and doing some soul searching is exactly what you need.  It is better than going out on dates knowing that you will never have a second date due to your heart is just not into it.  We all need time to reflect and putting your dating on the back burner. I myself did this about 4 years ago and the benefits were amazing.  You whole outlook on being single changed.  When you are able to be clear about what you want out of the next relationship then it’s time to jump back into the scene.  So if your goals aren’t clear or your not over past relationships and the hurt that goes along with them just take a break.  You may consider relationship coaching or therapy.

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